#RussianDiplomacy #KimJongUn #UkraineWar #InternationalRelations #AxisOfAwkwardness
By: TheJestPress.com
In a display of international bromance not seen since the last Bond villain mixer, Russia’s top diplomat Sergey Lavrov paid a chummy visit to North Korean leader Kim Jong Un this week. As Pyongyang is reportedly being drawn deeper into the Ukraine war—without even knowing how to use Google Maps—the two aspiring supervillains met to exchange hugs, hard stares, and, presumably, Pinterest boards of missile designs.
Eyewitnesses say the handshake lasted longer than most North Korean lunch breaks. Lavrov arrived bearing a bag of Russian delicacies, which Kim mistook for a new type of rocket fuel and ordered taste-tested by his valet. The pair discussed “expanding cooperation,” which diplomatic sources clarify is code for “please send us more stuff the West has banned.”
Insiders claim that Kim Jong Un appeared excited to enter international headlines for something other than haircut bans and missile launches. “Of course I want North Korea to be a global player,” he reportedly said. “We’ve been waiting decades for the chance to intervene in someone else’s war. Preferably one we know nothing about.”
At the top of the agenda was reportedly North Korea’s immediate question: “Which side are we on again?” Russian officials reassured Kim that Pyongyang would receive a complimentary subscription to ‘Dictators Digest’ and a starter kit of war memes as soon as their aid shipment arrives.
Meanwhile, analysts warn the growing partnership could further destabilize international peace, or at least give late-night comedians their best material since Boris Yeltsin danced the Macarena.
As the talks concluded, Lavrov praised the “unbreakable bond” between Russia and North Korea, adding: “It’s like peanut butter and jelly, if both were banned by international sanctions.”
Stay tuned as Pyongyang’s latest adventure into foreign policy either fizzles out like a North Korean missile test or explodes into history—similarly to a North Korean missile test.
By: TheJestPress.com
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