#Elmogate #ElmoHacked #SesameStreetScandal #ElmoGate2024 #NotSoFuzzy
By: TheJestPress.com
Children and parents everywhere were horrified Monday morning after discovering a rash of antisemitic posts appearing on Elmo’s official X (formerly Twitter) account. The beloved red Muppet, known for his high-pitched giggle and chronic third-person self-reference, apparently became the latest victim in a recent wave of celebrity social media hacks. But no one expected that a resident of Sesame Street could be embroiled in such scandal.
“Me don’t think Elmo supposed to say that,” commented Cookie Monster beneath a now-deleted post that asked followers, “Who runs the weather machine?” Big Bird was unavailable for comment, reportedly undergoing emergency crisis counseling.
X’s Trust and Safety department assured the public that the posts were not representative of Elmo’s views, emphasizing, “While Elmo’s usual hot takes include things like ‘sharing’ and ‘tickling,’ our team can confirm that puppet hands never typed those posts.” Elmo’s spokespuppet released an official statement: “Elmo loves everybody! Except for maybe Oscar, but that’s because he smells funny. Elmo didn’t write those mean things.”
The hack, authorities believe, was perpetrated by someone who “doesn’t respect the sanctity of muppets or friendship.” FBI sources are investigating leads in the general Hacker Triangle, somewhere between Russia, 4chan, and that kid in your eighth-grade class who still uses MySpace.
Parents worried about explaining this mess to their kids were provided a helpful guide by PBS. Step one: “Remind your children that Elmo is a puppet, and real people are much less fluffy.”
X’s CEO Elon Musk chimed in with his own tweet: “DM me, Elmo. I get hack all the time. It’s just X’s way of saying ‘I love you!’”
At press time, Elmo’s account was restored, sharing the heartwarming message: “Elmo sorry! Elmo back! Elmo loves all of his friends (even Grouch ones).” The world can only hope that next time, hackers aim for Snuffleupagus’s account, which hasn’t posted since 2009.
By: TheJestPress.com
Leave a comment