#NoNapZones #InsomniaOlympics #SleepyStretch #ZenZzzs #JoggingToBed
By: TheJestPress.com
Breaking: Scientists Have Mild Solution for Sleepless Nights – Try Mild Movement
In a study sure to put both insomniacs and the fitness-averse at ease (or possibly even to sleep), sleep researchers have unveiled the ultimate cure for insomnia: doing just enough exercise to say you’ve exercised, but not enough to break a sweat.
According to experts who may or may not have based their findings on watching chilled-out grandpas in the park, the secret to overcoming insomnia isn’t rigorous HIIT workouts or that military bootcamp you bought on a whim, but gentle activities like yoga, tai chi, walking, and jogging—though they cautioned that jogging “should be attempted only at the speed of someone trying not to spill their tea.”
Insomniacs everywhere are already lining up at sporting goods stores to buy new yoga mats, walking sticks, and the latest innovation: the “Sleep Strider”—a treadmill that gradually slows down until it rocks you into a gentle nap. While hardcore gym bros are shuddering at this research, yogis and mall walkers have declared it “the golden age of horizontal fitness.”
Tai Chi, described as “martial arts for people who want to fight only sleepiness,” is surging in popularity. Meanwhile, the inventor of jogging, who originally intended it as a way to escape from wild animals rather than the ghost of wakefulness, could not be reached for comment—he’s sleeping.
Doctors everywhere are now recommending these soft approaches to fitness. “If sleep is elusive, try moving just enough to lull your body into thinking you’ve accomplished something,” one doctor said. “Alternatively, just carry a yoga mat around anywhere you go. The placebo effect never sleeps.”
So try these gentle activities tonight—your dreams (and your cat, on your yoga mat) are waiting.
By: TheJestPress.com
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