#Satire #TrumpTactics #OECD #AustraliaNews #TaxDodgers
By: TheJestPress.com
**Australia Realizes Multinational Tax Windfall Is Actually Drop In Desert, Thanks to Trump’s Bold “No Money, No Problem” Strategy**
CANBERRA—Local government officials were reportedly last seen staring wistfully at the horizon this week, after Australia learned it would be missing out on billions in sweet, sweet tax revenue from multinational corporations. This crushing revelation came as former US President Donald Trump, wielding all the subtlety of a wombat on a sugar high, decided to abruptly torpedo the much-anticipated global tax reform led by the OECD.
The international agreement, which aimed to ensure Google’s and Amazon’s tax bills are higher than a medium extra cheese pizza, is now less likely to succeed than a kangaroo in figure skating. “We really believed this might be the year,” sighed an Australian treasury official, polishing the nation’s one remaining gold coin. “But then Trump shouted something about ‘America First, Everyone Else Last, and Make Tax Evasion Great Again.’ Now all we have is empty pockets and the lingering scent of missed opportunities.”
When questioned about his hard stance, Trump explained, “I don’t like global deals. Unless I win. And Australia, they’re lovely people, but isn’t it called Down Under for a reason?”
Finance Minister Jim Chalmers attempted to put a positive spin on the news. “Sure, it’s disappointing, but honestly, who needs tax revenue? We still have kangaroo tourism and selling hats with corks on them. Plus, there’s always hope someone will leave us a nice tip.”
Meanwhile, Apple and Google headquarters reportedly celebrated with elaborate spa days, paid for with money they definitely did not pay tax on.
The Australian public has been urged to check their sofas for any spare change, “just in case we need to pave a few roads or invent homegrown search engines,” Chalmers added.
At press time, officials were spotted Googling “How to invent thriving tech giants” and “Best ways to look busy when the budget is empty.”
By: TheJestPress.com
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