#ImmuneBoost #SocialDistancing #SickSenses #FaceValue #BrainyBodies
By: TheJestPress.com
**Study Reveals: Merely Looking at Your Sick Friend Preps Your Immune System AND Makes You Want to Back Away Slowly**
Groundbreaking scientists have discovered that the old saying “don’t look at me, I’m sick” isn’t just melodrama anymore—it’s neurology and immunology teaming up for your survival! According to a recent study, simply glancing at someone who’s pulling that “I definitely licked a subway pole” look does more than just make you subtly edge toward the nearest exit. It apparently beefs up your immune system and rewires your brain for maximum germ-dodging.
Using highly sophisticated technology (read: showing people mugshots of sick folks), researchers found that regions of the brain involved in monitoring personal space started flashing harder than a disco on double espresso. Volunteers reported feeling a sudden, irresistible urge to suggest virtual hangouts and wave from across the street, all while clutching their hand sanitizer like a sacred relic.
Even weirder: a humble blood test revealed that after being shown a “sniffly face,” participants’ blood was swimming with more innate lymphoid cells (science code for “germ bouncers”). Apparently, just the *sight* of Aunt Marion’s pollen-ravaged sneeze-face puts your immune response into DEFCON-3. You don’t even have to hear that honking nose-blow—your body’s already unloading antibodies like confetti at a surprise party no one wanted.
“This could change everything about how we fight disease,” said Dr. Hank U. Notsick, who hasn’t made direct eye contact since 2019. “Soon, prescription cold remedies may just include PowerPoints of sick folks mid-cough.”
So, next time your pal pops up on Zoom with a suspiciously nasal tone, thank your immune system for the upgrade—and maybe turn off your webcam. After all, even your innate lymphoid cells appreciate a little personal space.
By: TheJestPress.com
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