#DryHumor #TapDancing #H2OhNo #LiquidAssets #SpongeBobWhereAreYou
By: TheJestPress.com
In a shocking twist that nobody, including the local swimming pool association, saw coming, the city of Dribbleton now faces the unprecedented crisis of running out of water “within weeks.” Scientists have described the situation as “wetter-than-ever, except in all the wrong ways,” leaving residents wondering if their beloved morning shower is now a relic of the past.
Local officials, after a rigorous emergency meeting that lasted almost as long as a cat’s bath, unveiled a dynamic five-step plan to conserve water:
1. **Replacing fountains with interpretive dance*
2. **Mandatory armpit high-fives instead of hand washing*
3. **Encouraging cacti as the official houseplant*
4. **Renaming Main Street to ‘Dusty Lane’*
5. **Strictly limiting all water balloon fighting to exactly zero seconds*
One resident, Sally Moisture, expressed her concern. “I haven’t seen a puddle since ‘Duck Duck Splash’ got banned at school. My kids might think showers are a myth, like affordable housing or polite drivers.”
Entrepreneurs have already seized the moment, with pickled cucumber juice vending machines popping up across town. “It’s salty, but you can almost wash your hands in it… for a price,” declared local businessman Jerry Sponge.
Mayor Dewey Drip addressed the city: “Let’s unite. Share baths, recycle dishwater for coffee, and remember, sweat is just natural hydration.” Sources say he later fainted in a sauna.
In related news, city officials have voted unanimously to move the annual rubber duck race to the public library — which is also running out of coffee.
As residents practice their best rain dances and look longingly at restaurant ice cubes, one thing is clear: The only thing drier than Dribbleton in July is the city’s sense of humor.
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By: TheJestPress.com
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