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Dentist’s Protein Shake Plot: Got a Taste for Murder, Literally!
#DentistOnTrial #KillerSmile #ShakyAlibi #CrimeAndIncisors #ToothHurts By: TheJestPress.com In what local news has dubbed “The Case of the Pulp Fiction Potion,” Dr. Gavin Plaque, DDS, has officially traded his white dentist’s coat for an orange…
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Dentist’s Protein Shake Plan: Killer Teeth or Just Bad Blending?
#DentistDrama #MurderByMouthwash #ProteinShakeScandal #DrillAndKill #ToothDecayTrial By: TheJestPress.com **Dentist Swaps Cavity Filling For Killer Filling: Local Dentist On Trial For Poison Protein Shake Plot** In news that has shaken the dental and smoothie communities alike,…
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Britain’s Oldest WWII Veteran Finally Runs Out of Birthday Candles at 110
# Satire #WWIIVeteran #CentenarianNews #UKHistory #ByTheJestPress By: TheJestPress.com UK’s Oldest WWII Veteran, Donald Rose, Dies at 110 – Nation Scrambles to Promote Slightly Younger Guy In breaking news that has left the entire British…
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UK’s Oldest WWII Vet, Donald Rose, Finally Calls It Quits at 110
#RIPDonald #UKHistory #SuperCentenarian #WWIIHero #CheekyVeterans By: TheJestPress.com Britain is flying its metaphorical (and literal) Union Jack at half-mast as news broke that the nation’s oldest WWII veteran, Donald Rose, finally surrendered to enemy forces…
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FEMA’s Magic Eraser Saves Camp Mystic From 100-Year Flood—Oops, Expansion Ahead!
#Satire #FEMA #FloodZone #UrbanPlanning #CampMystic By: TheJestPress.com **FEMA Accidentally Removes Camp Mystic Buildings from Flood Map After Mistaking Them for AirBnB Yurts** In a daring stroke of bureaucratic genius, the Federal Emergency Management Agency…
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Arizona ER Mistakes Plague for Flu, Patient Files Ghostly Complaint
#PlagueInTheDesert #ArizonaProblems #ModernMedicine #ERDrama #NotBlackDeathAgain By: TheJestPress.com **Arizona ER Patient Dies Of Plague, Doctors Blame “Surprise Throwback Week”** TEMPE — In a move medical experts are calling “unexpectedly medieval,” an Arizona patient died in…
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Air India Fuel Mix-Up: Passengers Ask, “Is This a Test Flight?”
#AirIndia #AviationNews #Satire #CrashInvestigation #OopsMoment By: TheJestPress.com **Air India’s Latest Crash Attributed to “Highly Effective” Fuel-Saving Strategy, Report Finds** In a bold move designed to save both fuel and headlines, an Air India flight…
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“High Times Gone Wrong: Cannabis Raid Turns Cali Worker Into Ghost”
#PotProblems #CaliforniaDreaming #WeedNews #Satire #Busted By: TheJestPress.com TRINITY COUNTY, CA — In a stunning turn of events that left both law enforcement and snack suppliers reeling, a massive raid on a California cannabis farm…
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El Chapo’s Son Pleads Guilty, Family Drug Empire Airbnb Closing Sale
#OvidioGuilty #CartelComedy #NarcoNews #ElChapoJr #SatireNews By: TheJestPress.com **Son of ‘El Chapo’ Pleads Guilty, Asks if Plea Deal Comes with Complimentary Tacos** In a dramatic courtroom twist that left both judge and jury hungry, Ovidio…