-
Elon Musk Blames Apple and OpenAI for AI’s Terrible Monopoly Dance
#ElonVsFruit #AIWars #OpenAIrony #BigTechDrama #LawsuitLulz By: TheJestPress.com and Sponsored by: https://freecash.com/r/c97b0ab020579663572c In a legal move that surprised absolutely no one, billionaire, Twitter hobbyist, and part-time Dogecoin whisperer Elon Musk has filed an antitrust lawsuit…
-
Trump Fires Fed Governor Cook, Declares War on Central Bank Monopoly
#TrumpFiresFed #BattleoftheBank #LisaCook #SatireNews #YoureFiredAgain By: TheJestPress.com and Sponsored by: https://freecash.com/r/c97b0ab020579663572c **Trump Claims He’s Fired Fed Governor Lisa Cook, Central Bank Wonders Who Gave Him the Office Keys** In a surprising turn of events…
-
Lil Nas X Arrested: Authorities Confused if This Is Art or Crime
#LilNasX #LAArrest #SatireNews #OldTownFelonies #IndustryBabyTrouble By: TheJestPress.com and Sponsored by: https://freecash.com/r/c97b0ab020579663572c LOS ANGELES, CA — In news that’s leaving fans somewhere between “MONTERO” and “Don’t Call Me Anymore, Officer!”, rapper Lil Nas X is…
-
Breaking: Hospital Hits Wrong Photo Op, Accidentally Targets Journalists Instead
#Satire #GazaNews #MediaMayhem #BreakingNews #PressPassesGone By: TheJestPress.com and Sponsored by: https://freecash.com/r/c97b0ab020579663572c In a shocking turn of events that no one could’ve possibly seen coming (except literally everyone), reports have now confirmed that an Associated…
-
Evergrande Takes Final Bow, Drops Out of Stock Market Drama
#EvergrandeExit #DelistedDreams #BankruptBillionaires #ChinaCrisis #NotSoGrand By: TheJestPress.com and Sponsored by: https://freecash.com/r/c97b0ab020579663572c SHANGHAI – In an event described by financial analysts as “even less surprising than a Marvel sequel,” Chinese real estate behemoth Evergrande has…
-
Canada Sends Drones and Tanks, Because Peace Is Overrated
#Satire #CanadaToTheRescue #DronesWithApologies #PoliteArmor #BreakingNews By: TheJestPress.com and Sponsored by: https://freecash.com/r/c97b0ab020579663572c **Drones, Armored Vehicles Part of Canada’s $2B Military Aid Package For Ukraine—Maple Syrup “Not Included This Time”** In a move sure to strike…
-
Kyiv’s Independence Day Surprise: Nuclear Power Plant Gets Unwanted Spotlight
#NuclearKnockKnock #NotSoHappyIndependence #PowerPlantProblems #SatireSizzle #DiplomaticDrama By: TheJestPress.com and Sponsored by: https://freecash.com/r/c97b0ab020579663572c In a development that has left international onlookers scratching their heads and re-Googling “Chernobyl 2.0,” Moscow has announced that Kyiv decided to celebrate…
-
Japanese Automakers Cry Uncle as Tariffs Turn Up the Heat
#TariffTrouble #HondaHorrors #ToyotaTantrum #CarMaDrama #ImportInsanity By: TheJestPress.com Japan’s automakers entered DEFCON Prius this week, as U.S. tariffs pulled the e-brake on the Land Cruiser of their happiness. According to highly emotional, possibly jet-lagged spokespeople…
-
Flight Takes Unexpected Detour Thanks to Exploding Device Drama on Board
# #SkyHighSurprises #TechFailsTakeFlight #BurningUpTheSkies #FrequentFryerMiles #InFlightHotSeat By: TheJestPress.com In what experts are now calling a “breathtaking demonstration of modern technology’s explosive potential,” an American Airlines flight from Dallas to Orlando was unceremoniously diverted Tuesday…
